I once heard a pilot talk about something they learned in flight training: trust your instruments and your training, especially when you're experiencing vertigo. If you feel like you're upside down but your instruments say you're level with the horizon, don't start jerking the controls. (wheel? helm? Only fighter-planes have a stick, so what's that thing in a commercial jet called?)

The bottom line is that despite what Star Wars fans might tell you, you can't always trust your feelings. Or, put more clearly: our feelings are real and purposeful, but they can't be our final decision-makers.

I guess that's not a super popular idea in 2020, but then again, was it ever? And on top of that it probably sounds pretty weird for an artist to say it. Aren't us creative-types supposed to feel even more deeply than other people? I don't really think that's true, but sometimes I sure feel like it is. But feeling deeply doesn't mean you always let that drive your life. And on the flip-side, doing your best to make wise decisions doesn't mean that you don't still feel deeply.

I wrote "Spotlight" while singing in the car and thinking about being honest about my experiences. To be more specific, I was thinking about how honesty is what people always say they want from a musician, but there are a lot of different ideas about what that means. Occasionally as an artist there are those people that just seem to want your ugly or nothing at all.

I want to be honest and genuine, I also want to help people. I want to help them move "onward and upward" past just their immediate emotions. Ultimately, I get to choose what I give my focus to, no matter what I'm going through. I get to choose what to give the spotlight to in my life, and that's true for everyone.

"I got up on the stage, and it did not feel a thing like it was supposed to."  There are a lot of ideas about what performing music is supposed to be like. Sometimes the real thing meets those expectations, but other times it doesn't feel that great. I've played concerts where my stage mix barely sounded like music, instead it was more like a bunch of instruments that just happened to be playing (loudly) at the same time. Maybe I was just hungry, hot, or tired from moving equipment, or maybe I really needed to go to the bathroom.

In those moments I have had to fall back on my training: Breathe. Listen for the queues. Don't oversing or overplay. I've  thought I performed terribly, but then had an audience member tell me how much they enjoyed it. In weird little moments like that the irony often felt thicker than the relief.

"I can't trust the feelings that are screaming for the spotlight, 'cause if I had, would not have made it here. You can say that everything is crashing for a moment, or shut your mouth and then say something clear."

Life can sometimes feel like vertigo or a noisey stage. That's when we have to go back to the Word of God and live by the truth of wisdom.

Angry at someone in traffic or the person that did you wrong? You still gotta forgive 'em. Already made a commitment, but something else came up you'd rather do? You gotta go with your first word, or ask to be excused knowing that the final decision isn't up to you. Attracted to that person, but know it's a bad road? You gotta move on. Know what God says about it, but your feelings are running the other way? Dig your heels in.

I go a little deeper in the second verse, which I haven't talked about much. And you may be surprised to hear this, but God can relate to your feelings more than you've probably ever realized. But we'll talk about that stuff next time in part 2.

Onward and Upward >:)
-SD

That dresser has been with me my whole life, as has a lot of the furniture in our house.  There's a sweater vest in our closet that is around 80 years old.  We wear it all the time when we get cold, and the thing still could pass as new.  Let's face it: some stuff just used to be made tougher.

I included this basically for that reason: our house is a mix of really new things and really old things.  The age of certain pieces here and there sometimes still amazes me when Grandma tells me where they came from.  This particular dresser is right out of my room, and I'm pretty sure it's been in my room my whole life, so it's got a lot of history, even long before me.  In order to bring it as a setpiece, I had to empty all the clothes out of it.  Talk about a messy space....

I wanted to have at least one thing representing each member of my immediate household on the set.  The bike is one of Grandpa's, and I've always kind of associated him with them.  He and my uncle are both avid bikers (my uncle has been into both serious Mountain- and Road-Biking).  Grandpa likes to get around town that way and has done it all his life, and as I mentioned in another blog, he used to buckle me into the back from time to time and I would ride along  (you can see that in the video too).  I remember doing this quite a few times to go down the river to fish when I was pretty small.

So the airplanes are from Grandma's side of the family, the German side.  They were handmade by my Great Uncle Huddle.  He lived in a small village in Germany called Possenheim.  The place really was (and probably still is) an interesting little hamlet.  His home was kind of a farm: a chicken barn beside the drive way is what I remember specifically.  I recollect befriending and having and extended "cocka-doodle-doo" conversation with a large rooster there. 

These are German hiking gear.  The hats are basically folk-hats.  As a kid I used to grab one of those all the time and put a mask and cape on and play Zorro (didn’t matter that it wasn’t mexican, I just needed a black hat!)The canes are pretty special.  Basically, every time someone would climb a mountain, or go to a notable city, or visit a cool site, they got a new souvenir plate to hammered onto their cane.  It encapsulated a person’s travels.  The two canes that appear in the video are the one gave me (which he had for YEARS of his life), and my personal one.

For those who don't know, this sword is a katana.  A katana is what most people would just call “a samurai sword”.  It’s a traditional Japanese sword.  I spent a good amount of time in martial arts doing a mixed form of Kenpo, as well as Aikijutsu and Kickboxing.  I did some tournaments, and while most of our training didn’t focus around weapons, it did incorporate them to some degree.  Truth be told, the katana wasn’t one of the things that our style majored on.  But among the martial arts weapons that I have at least a basic working knowledge of, this one seemed like it would be the most noticeable in a video.  A bo staff would have just faded into the dark, sai and nunchaku would have been too short.  You get the idea.

To an extent, I actually chose the saxophone for my mom (and myself too, but she was definitely a big factor).  I already played the piano and sang, but when I got into middle school band we had to choose and instrument, and for me it was between saxophone and trumpet.  All things considered, I’d actually REALLY enjoy to learn the trumpet as well.  I love a lot of things about that instrument.  But my mom always loved the saxophone, and at that time I knew nothing about either one, so I went with the sax.  That decision actually ended up being a lot bigger than I realized, as it became my major instrument in college and led me into playing a lot of jazz during that time.

My mom loves horses.  She used to ride when she was younger, and I know she’d love to again.  This is something I got for her one year at Christmas actually a local Chinese restaurant.  The folks who run it are really sweet people and live just a few doors down from us.  Mom’s room is full of little statues and figurines, a lot of which are horses, so I thought it would be cool to get her something bold to add to her collection.

I hope you enjoyed the music video for The Roses!  And rest assured, a lot more cool stuff is coming.  Make sure to subscribe to my YouTube channel and connect with me on social media to keep up with all the cool things going on!

Get "The Roses" from my album 'The Spark':
CD Baby: https://www.cdbaby.com/cd/samuelday4
iTunes: https://tinyurl.com/kvat72c
Amazon mp3: https://tinyurl.com/n2wgys9

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As I've mentioned in other blogs, I've known for a long time that I wanted to get started making music videos.  But I wanted them to be quality.  As a guy that's into cinematography and filmmaking, I didn't want to just make something that was "passable".  Now, that doesn't mean I think there isn't room for improvement, I KNOW there is, but I'm happy with what eventually became The Roses video, and I think that's saying something. 

Now, I know some folks who do good work in video.  But whether it be due to distance or a number of other factors, it seemed like the approach to do this with the most wiggle room would be in-house.  But that was going to require a LOT of learning, both for myself AND for my crew.  Sure, I had made good-looking video pieces before, but I spent months diving into to technical stuff I didn't even know existed to try to up my game.  Flat camera profiles, color grading, lighting setups, new software and hardware.  It was like putting myself through school, often just trying to figure out what questions to ask. 

I turned to Missy and Austin, both members of my tech crew, and said "Do you want to help me do this?"  So we started meeting regularly for training sessions.  I was teaching Missy to be a camera operator, which includes a lot more than point and shoot.  It was about how to expose properly for skin-tones in a flat profile, shooting handheld vs. shoulder vs. glide track.  Different types of lenses.  Employing artistic framing.   Austin became a focus puller.  It was about setting marks and hitting the timing, using measurements as much as eyeballing the monitor, all while coordinating with Missy's movements.  All things told, the learning and training process took something like a year.

Ultimately, that worked out really well for the video.  Missy and Austin did most of the shooting (obviously of the performance shots), with me taking the reigns for family profile shots as well as object close-ups. 

But cameras aren't all that is involved in a video.  There are lots of other little things like:
-Storyboard
-Shopping Lists
-Networking
-Set Design
-Wardrobe

When I finally settled on The Roses being my first video, I knew I had to plan.  I started with storyboarding, which really kind of began with me sitting and imagining the video and then putting it on paper.  Originally, the video was supposed to have 2-3 sets, performance venues mixed with this "Soul Set" that was supposed to be inside of my head.  Ultimately though, once we had filmed on the Soul Set, I realized that it didn't need anything else: there was already a ton there to work with, and having a bunch of exposition in my first video before the music even started may not have been the right move.

There was also the design of the set: it needed to be romantic, without being cheesy.  Heartfelt without being forced.  When I pictured lots of candles and roses in my head it looked great, but when I said it out loud, I knew it could have been perceived a lot of different ways. I talked with Missy a lot about not only the shape of the set, but what items would be in it.  This wasn't just a question of what would look good and be relevant, but also what we could actually move.

I also knew I had to plan for everything: when could everyone be available (the family, the crew, me, and the people needed to move the setpieces), the screen rental.  And I had to plan around weather: what if there was wind?  When would there be the least chance for humidity and bugs?  Each of these questions led to something new being added to a list, whether it was a shopping list or a to-do list.  I even made an announcement at church that I was taking donations for white pillar candles.  My basic equation was, "IF I'm going to do THIS, then HOW is it going to get done, and WHAT is needed for that?" This included makeup, which I have had very little experience with, so as you'll see in the behind the scenes video, I got Lauren and Missy (two real, live, actual girls) to consult with me on the matter.  They aren't huge makeup wearers, but they know enough to help out a guy making a video.  Thanks to them and the internet I now know more about the difference between a matte powder and a liquid foundation.  I even have my own set of application sponges like a grown-up. 

One of the key parts of this video are pieces of footage from my childhood, many of which ended up being from some of our trips to Germany to visit my Great Grandparents.  I had seen other music videos do similar things before, but I wanted this stuff to be integral, not only as cutaway shots, but also physically playing behind me on a projection screen.

This meant going through MANY hours of footage.  And it was a multi-step process. 

We have a pretty big amount of videotaped family footage.  My mom was a great documentarian.  There's everything from Baby Sam, to Grandma's 50th birthday party, to high school jazz band concerts.  The family already wanted me to transfer these tapes to DVD, but getting them ready for the video required strategically choosing which tapes to convert first, then copying the DVDs to a hard drive in order to edit them.  After that, it was combing through all the footage to find the right moments.  I needed a general reel of stuff to go behind my performance, but then 4 other reels that were specific to each member of the family that would be featured.  Then each of those reels needed to be looped and put on discs so that they could be cued up and projected during shooting.  it came down to the wire, but it got done.

It was the weekend of Thanksgiving, the day of the shoot, and I was a man with a plan.  It actually worked out that my Uncle and his family were in town at the exact same time that everything else finally came together (they live 700 miles away).  

First I had to head out to Monroe to meet with Kevin Marietta of Temporary Technology to pick up the projection screen.  I thank God for this connection.  I sometimes do side work for Kevin's company, which mostly consists is moving gear to events of all sizes, setting it up, running the event, and tearing it down.  Were you there when King's Island did a media event announcing their newest roller coaster?  That was us......but that's another blog.  Anyway, because of that connection and experience, I know how to rig up one of these giant screens.  But even more importantly, Kevin was gracious enough to give me a great deal on rental as one of his employees.  Still, once I had paid for the rental I wanted to make it count.

Next was meeting with Jeff Martin (thanks Jeff!) who helped me move all the furniture and other items from my house to the back of our church where we were filming.

The afternoon was about presetting as much indoors as we could, as well as doing some final camera tests.  Next was a quick break, building the set, then hair and makeup. 

I had a shot list put together, knowing certain things might change.  The original plan was for the shoot to take two days.  We were going to get as much as we could on day 1, tear down, then set back up the next day.  But once I was in it, I was in it, and I REALLY didn't want to have to tear down and set back up, trying to make it look exactly the same.

The wind fought us a first, blowing curtains up, setpieces down, and candles out.  Never mind the fact that the screen was practically a giant sail.  But as the hour grew later and the night got colder, the wind did what it was told do and quit.

Long story short, there were quite a few people there as filming got started, but by the time 3am rolled around, it was just Missy and I left pushing through the last shots (Austin stayed pretty late, but needed to get home).  I'm thankful to the gracious neighbors who didn't call the cops about lights and music outside at 2am. 

All things considered, it was about a 16 hour day, give or take.

The next day was clean-up.  Since we shot at the church and it was Saturday, everything needed to get back into working order for service the next morning.  Thanks to Frankie Jennings for bringing his truck to help move stuff back to my house.  There was funny looking candle wax all over not only the ground, but some of the furniture and other items as well.

The lights had to be disassembled, the screen folded up and ready to move, and all the gear reorganized.  It was a task, but it was better than having to do all that PLUS set up and shoot that day.  I started uploading the footage while I cleaned up, and I was happy with what I saw.

I wish I could say "a couple weeks later, and the editing was done and the video was ready for release!"  Not the case.  Editing on its own of course was it's own thing; trying to keep things interesting and engaging in a video that isn't "high energy" in style took a lot big-boy decisions, putting my post-production hat on the way I would do with audio in the studio.  But mostly, I spent months afterward working out some technical problems I ran into.  I won't go into detail here about what they were, but countless hours, days, nights, and weekends went into researching and working through issues I didn't even know existed, much of it having to do with color grading.  If you really want to know more, talk to me in person.

Suffice it to say  that I learned a lot, and it's knowledge that nobody can take away from me now.  I suspect in the long run, it will only benefit me, whether I'm the guy editing or not.

There were a lot of clips I thought about highlighting early on.  If I'd catch something of interest while the tapes were scanning to DVD, I'd quickly write down the timestamp on my storyboard so I'd know to look for it later.  But ultimately, I thought the last clip was the perfect end-button for this video.

We're in Germany, and I'm about 5 or 6 years old.  I'm going on about the things I want to do with my future.  I was a talkative kid to the point of being rude sometimes, but I was also determined and enthusiastic.  And in the middle of it, I said the following which was caught on tape:

"Mommy, Papaw, Mamaw, when I grow up I'm going to let you see every concert, every preaching stage, and every video I make."

I already knew.  It sort of stunned the family the first time I showed them the music video.  It was so long ago that they had forgotten about that particular instance.  They said I prophesied my own future.  I agree.

My Grandpa has worked pretty much his whole life.  Most of his jobs haven't been glamorous, but he knows that age is a state of mind, and it's one he refuses to take on.  To this day, he works a full time job, is a Reverend, rides his bike all over the place, and builds all kinds of stuff.  Plus, he often comes and helps out with concerts, including moving gear.  That is, when he isn't cleaning the church or keeping things up around the house.

Grandpa has actually built several things I use regularly for music.  I designed a rolling box with a pullout drawer, a port for cables, and some safety guards on top for a laptop.  It use it for nearly every concert I play, and after he made a few adjustments of his own, he was more than happy to make it a reality.  He and I built the vocal booth I use together (my social media followers probably know it as "dragon booth").  And that metal arm contraption connected to my white guitar?  Yup, I started with the initial design, but he made it a reality.

He is very much from a time and place where everyone fished and hunted, and some of his stories from childhood and his teen years feel like some lost chapter of Tom Sawyer.  Don't get me wrong; I enjoy the outdoors too, but I spend a lot more of my time in music, tech, and art, whereas Grandpa can often be found in his workshop. 

One thing I remember from childhood though is "the bike seat".  He had this kid-sized chair on the back of his bike that he would ride me around on, often back and forth to the river.  5 year old me may have been terrified of crawfish and daddy-long-legs, but we took a swing at fishing anyway.

When my Mom and I (as an infant) had no other place to go, Grandma and Grandpa's house became our house, and we all grew into a team.  During all that time and long, long before, Grandpa has been diligently working, and the work he has done has been a huge part of enabling me to do what I do today.

Much like Grandpa, a lot of the work mom has done hasn't seemed glamorous.  For years, aside from working a regular job, Mom has done the bookwork for our Church as a volunteer position.  She is meticulous down to the penny.  She has spent more time in our home office than anyone could ever want to, and spends a hefty chunk of her other time helping my Grandma run errands for the family and church.  None of that has stopped her from helping me with concerts and running my gear table as well.

Mom never lied to me.  She never lied to me about Santa Clause, about where babies came from, or about the circumstances surrounding why she had to fight for custody of me when I was born.  I don't mean this to be negative, but when I was a kid in the first grade and I knew all the other children's parents were lying to them about Old Saint Nick and mine wasn't, that informed our relationship for years to come.  (Don't worry, I don't run around raining on other people's kids' parades).  Mom disciplined me.  Mom didn't let me get away with garbage.  But she was also my friend.  None of that has really changed.

To be clear, I hold no animosity toward my father, of whom I don't really have a conscious memory (other than pictures and videos).  But, mom tells me that when she brought me home as a baby from the hospital, she held me and cried because she knew what a big responsibility this was.  And a year and a half later when the divorce papers came in mail with little warning, she stuck it out.

For a few years in my early life, Uncle John was in the house together with Mom, Grandma, Grandpa, and I.  For some reason I have this memory of us eating cereal and watching the 90's Spider-Man cartoons on a Saturday morning. 

Uncle John and Grandpa have some pretty strong similarities: they are both bike-riding dudes who were in the army and excel at building stuff. 

I bring this up because the two of them built me one of those cool backyard play-sets when I was a kid.  You know, the kind that had a second story fort, a swing set, a climbing rope, and a couple of ladders? 

We lived in a small house on a dirt road at the edge of town, right across from a farm.  A lot of people in our small city didn't even know that gravel lane was there.  There's a reason the smell of manure doesn't bother me in the spring.  Don't get me wrong: we weren't poor.  We had food to eat, I had toys to play with, etc.  But our back yard was a half-acre on a lane with only two other kids, and I spent some of my free time chasing the occasional chicken.  So, having a home base to have all my imaginary, super-hero adventures in?  Pretty big deal.

Uncle now has a great family of his own (they're our family too, obviously!), but I'm glad he was there to help at such an early time, too.

Grandma came to the U.S. when she was 17 after meeting my Grandpa when he was stationed in Germany through the Army.  She spoke no English.  Since then she has started and Pastors a church that still is thriving today (and of course, learned English.  Ironically, she now has to put forth real effort to get back into German). 

She could fill a lot of books with all the challenges she has faced over the years, even in her young life before she came to the country.  After she accepted Jesus and recognized the call to Pastor on her life, that didn't make a lot of people happy due to some unfortunate misunderstandings of scripture.  Whether it was because of what she believed or who she was, she endured a lot of downtalking and attacks over the years.  But it wasn't up to anyone else: it was between her and the Lord, and she followed through no matter what.  Like the others, the seeds she fought for then are benefiting me today. 

Even in my few years, I've seen her face a lot in her quest to be uncompromising yet walk in love and forgiveness with people.  If you've ever been in a leadership family, you know what I'm talking about.

Grandma and I are very similar, in that we are both pretty strong-willed and passionate about getting things done.  That has resulted in a relationship that is sometimes brutally honest.  We don't mess around with each other, and we don't intend to.  And you know what?  That's great, because we love each other and we're always after the truth to ultimately get things done.

Grandma has always told me "Do everything as unto the Lord" (Ephesians 6:7) is a scripture that the Lord stressed to her early in her Christian life, and she has always endeavored to live by that, whether it was cleaning someone else's house or her own.   And it's always stuck with me: do things with quality.  Whether it be music or business or anything else, I try to always remember that.

This video is for them.  And I challenge you to ask yourself,
"Who are my roses for?"

And these things have been on the RADIO!  I got to be a guest deeJay on WAIF's "Silent Witness Radio", and came back later in the year to do an on-air acoustic set with Michael (Peet) and Larry.  I got played on 96Rock Cincinnati, WEBN, and "Cincy Music Showcase" 100.7 and 106.3FM (also known as "The Project").  I got contacted by some web-based radio for permission to use my stuff as well.

Now, I wrote the song "Time to Live" right before a bunch of this radio stuff happened.  Interestingly enough, here's the pre-chorus lyric:

"How many times have we just let the monster tell us that
We'll never make it on the radio?
It's just a lie and I won't let that sucker hold me back
'Cause they'll be smart enough to play me though"

I got to do some great interviews with Iain Moss of JesusWired.com as well as Don Thrasher of Dayton Daily News!


More production came to the stage show, including props, wardrobe, and video. 

HOURS and DAYS were spent figuring out live video production, making clips, auditioning solutions, and drafting ideas for stuff that could be built.  Time went into picking out and customizing wardrobe for the stage.  We even got together and built "The House Chunk" from the Premonitions painting.  It has a much deeper meaning than you've seen yet, but one day soon it will all make sense!  I'm building more than just music here, there's a larger universe at play that, if you look, you'll see clues to all throughout my work in multiple mediums.

As far as the video is concerned, some great donations by several people on and off my tech crew has made it possible to bring a great production value to the stage.  Oh yeah, and I just got some scrims!

We played some great concerts.  Just look at this stuff.

I screen printed a lot of shirts, and got a nice setup put together in the basement.  That being said, it takes time!  The screens, the ink, the tape, the shirts, the colors the sizes.....my goodness.  So in the future, I'll probably give some of that work to a local business.  But still, if I want to do a special run on the fly, I can!

Peet and Sarah got married.  It's great having them on the music team, and we enjoyed going out to Maryland for the ceremony!  Peet (ok, his actual name is "Michael") was on the frontlines with me in college jazz band, and it's cool to be able to share that history as we take to various stages.  And Sarah is always willing to come help at concerts, which is very much appreciated.

I got my Master's Degree. It was quite a challenge, having been a music major in Undergrad, stepping into a Master's program made up of Business MBA courses and Communications Department courses.  After all, most of the people there had already spent four years in those fields.  But, I had success!

Onward and upward.  I'm thankful for my support crew, which has grown since this began (Mom, Grandma and Grandpa, Aunt Teresa, Tyler, Missy, Austin, Sarah)  It takes more hands than just mine to load gear, set up a stage, and plug everything in.  There are conversations being had right now about things to be created and done this year.  New levels.  I want more people to hear the music.  I've been performing with my live band both onstage and on the web.  What a time to be alive, when we can set up in front of my computer and play a concert for someone in Norway.  There are concerts to organize, videos to think about, new contacts to become acquainted with, images and art to create, and as always, new music to develop.  There are new adventures to be a part of, and people who need to know that THAT is how it's supposed to be.  And you're gonna love it.